Don't let 'communication' become 'contradiction'! These 8 home school communication skills and language techniques can be used by both teachers and parents
Time:2026-01-16
Source:Artstep
Home school communication is never as easy as just saying a few words.
Some teachers have offended parents by bluntly saying, 'Your child is too mischievous to control.'; Some parents have repeatedly asked why their child was not elected as a class leader, which has put a lot of pressure on teachers.
In fact, good home school communication is not about "persuading the other party", but about "putting oneself in others' shoes and mutual understanding". Today, I will share with you 8 "down-to-earth" home school communication skills and practical language. Whether you are a teacher or a parent, learning them can make communication smoother and help children grow better together!
1、 The 3 easiest pitfalls to overcome in home school communication
Many times, communication problems are not caused by a bad attitude, but by incorrect methods. First, let's take a look at these three common misconceptions. Have you also stepped on them
Report only 'problem', not 'process'
When communicating with parents, teachers often say, 'Your child didn't pass the exam again this time.' 'He always talks in class,' but they don't say, 'My child has been more diligent in his homework lately, but he accidentally made a few mistakes.' 'He speaks very actively in class, but occasionally chats softly with his desk mate.'; When parents communicate with teachers, they often say, 'Teacher, my child said you assigned too much homework,' but they don't say, 'Actually, the child can finish it on time, but they feel a bit tired.'.
Simply stating the problem can make the other person feel that 'you only see the shortcomings of the child', which can easily trigger resistance. When communicating, it is important to address both the issue and the details together, which should be both objective and sincere.
Replace "suggestion style" with "command style"
The teacher said, 'You must watch your child do homework every day, otherwise your grades will definitely not go up.'; Parents say, 'Teacher, you should pay more attention to my child and not always ignore him.'. This "commanding" tone can make the other person feel "blamed, demanded" and uncomfortable.
Home school communication is about "collaboration" rather than "superiors and subordinates". Using a suggestive tone of "we can try..." or "what do you think...?" is more likely to be accepted.
Wait for the outbreak of conflicts before communicating
Many teachers only approach parents when their children make serious mistakes, such as fighting or skipping classes; Parents only contact teachers when they feel that their children have been "wronged" (such as being criticized by teachers or having conflicts with classmates). Not communicating regularly can lead to negative news and easily create conflict between both parties.
Good communication should be "daily", even if it's just occasionally sharing a child's small progress, it can bring people closer and reduce conflicts.
2、 4 tips and language skills for communicating with parents, both professional and heartwarming
As a teacher, the core of communicating with parents is to make them feel your sincerity and willingness to cooperate with you. These 4 tips and phrases will help you easily deal with different scenarios:
When providing feedback on issues: "shortcomings + progress + suggestions", do not deny the child
Scenario: The child is distracted during class and procrastinates on homework
Incorrect wording: "Your child always loses focus in class and doesn't submit homework on time. If you don't pay attention, you won't be able to keep up!" (Only talking about the shortcomings, which can easily make parents anxious and resistant)
Correct phrasing: "Recently, I have observed that my child occasionally loses focus in class, such as in yesterday's math class where I missed the teacher's train of thought twice. However, my child's homework is more serious than before, and there are fewer typos. Let's try this: when doing homework at home, first help my child clean up their desk to reduce interference, take a 5-minute break after focusing for 20 minutes each time, and gradually help him develop a habit of concentration. What do you think?" (First ask questions, then praise progress, and finally give specific suggestions, which parents are more likely to accept)
When sharing progress: "Specific details + impact", let parents see their children's shining points
Scenario: The child actively helps classmates and speaks positively in class
Incorrect wording: "Your child has been doing well recently, keep up the good work!" (Too general, parents don't know exactly where their child is good at)
Correct phrasing: "Today I want to share with you a little progress of a child: Yesterday in Chinese class, my desk mate forgot to bring his notebook, and the child voluntarily lent him his notebook to use. Moreover, when answering questions in class, the child raised his hand three times and answered very systematically, and his classmates cheered him on! The child is becoming more and more caring, and his expression ability has also improved. Continuing to maintain it will definitely be better~" (Specific details can make parents feel your attention and also stimulate their enthusiasm)
When parents question: "Listen patiently + explain + empathize", without defending
Scenario: Parents question why their child was not selected as the group leader
Wrong wording: "Choosing a team leader depends on overall performance. Your child is not yet qualified, let's talk about it later!" (Using blunt excuses can easily make parents feel that you are biased)
Correct phrasing: "I really understand your desire for your child to exercise. Many parents hope their child can become a small cadre. When choosing a group leader this time, we mainly considered two aspects: 'actively helping classmates' and' being able to complete group tasks on time '. The child actually has great potential. For example, during the last group discussion, his ideas were very creative. We can encourage the child together and take the initiative to help classmates more. Next time we choose a small cadre, I will help the child seize opportunities. Do you think it's okay?" (First empathize, then explain the reasons, and finally give hope, which is easier for parents to understand)
In daily communication: "Occasionally sharing small details" to bring people closer together
Scenario: Unless there are special circumstances, I want to keep in touch with my parents
Incorrect wording: None (Many teachers do not communicate with parents in their daily lives, missing opportunities to get closer)
Correct phrasing: "Today I want to share a small detail with you: During break, my child took the initiative to clean the blackboard for me, and he was very sensible. Recently, my child has more friends in class, and I can always see him playing games with his classmates after class, and his condition is getting better and better." (Occasionally sharing your child's daily small things to let parents feel your care and reduce unfamiliarity)
3、 Core principle: The "three commonalities" of home school communication make cooperation smoother
Whether it's teachers or parents, remember these three "common" principles so that communication won't have major problems:
Common goal: All for the good of children. No matter what problem you encounter, first think about "what is most beneficial for the child" instead of "who is right and who is wrong".
Mutual respect: Teachers respect parents' educational methods, and parents respect teachers' teaching arrangements. Don't impose your own ideas on the other person, think from their perspective.
Collaboration: Teachers provide timely feedback on children's situations, and parents actively cooperate with the school's requirements. Without shifting blame or complaining, let's create a good environment for children's growth together.
In fact, there is no "standard answer" for home school communication, but as long as we hold a "sincere, understanding, and cooperative" mentality, and use appropriate skills and language, we can avoid conflicts and become "comrades in arms". After all, teachers and parents are never "opposites", but rather the people whose children should walk side by side on their journey of growth.